19th – 25th November 2004
Day one – Friday.
Yoga and inspiration
The lucky pennies got tucked into my pocket before I left the flat this morning. I feel
as though I need all the luck I can get today ‘cos my husband Steve is away for the
weekend. I’m a bit sad about that – first weekend apart in over a year.
It is a beautiful day – chilly but very sunny and crisp. After a shaky, unfocused start, I
have a good Yoga practice. There’s lots of good energy in the room today. I feel
lucky that I have this practice in my life and I also feel lucky that I have nice people
to practice with.
Get home, stroke Peanut, make toast, computer on. I have a couple of projects to
get stuck into today. Our website is pretty much finished and has gone live today – v.
excited about that! Spend most of the day working on my projects. I’m happy ‘cos
things are coming together well – I have spent the best part of the week researching
and planning this stuff. Inspiration is flowing quite freely today – wow, that’s lucky!
I have lots of communication with people today; from chatting with Steve and mates
over the email to people I don’t know on the phone. I work on my own a lot so when
it comes to communicating I tend to be a bit full on. I get days when I don’t have the
opportunity to talk to anyone until Steve gets home and then I bombard him. My
Mum and Steve’s Mum call me too – that makes me happy.
Sunshine is streaming into the flat. Peanut is sitting on the TV and looking very shiny. I
bought a new CD yesterday so keep listening to that – feeling lucky that our
temperamental CD player is deciding to play it! I like this new CD (Boomclick –
Halfway Between Tomorrow and Yesterday).
I want to encounter luck and think that I need to go out for a bit. Venture down to
M+S for something for my dinner – I don’t really want to cook tonight. Very lazy,
decide to drive. I get onto Camden Road – looks busy, I groan. What luck! The right
lane is totally clear! No one is turning right. I fly past all the queuing traffic. Nice. I love
my van. Please let there be a space… lovely! Van sized space right outside M+S! Get
a nice dinner and buy some chocolate but when I get home realise that I left the
choc in the shop. Bugger. Not so lucky on that one.
Speed clean the flat, play with Peanut, have a bath, have my dinner and then log
onto the Forum for idle and entertaining banter. Someone has posted a link to Lemon
Jelly’s new tune and video. I watch that a couple of times and enjoy. It’s called “Stay
with you” - a very happy tune – I think of Steve.
Drink wine, watch a bit of TV and then wake up in the craziest position on the sofa. It’s
4am – TV still on, Peanut in her fleecy radiator cradle looking at me strangely. Now, I
don’t feel so lucky at this present moment. In fact I’m pretty cross with myself. I have
to get up at 7 and due to the crayyyyzeee sleeping position, my left hip hurts! I get
into bed, Peanut comes too. I sleep on Steve’s side of the bed so I can smell him.
Day two – Saturday
Free rides, pizza, friends and wine
Bit chilly today. Thermals on.
I wake up feeling a bit groggy due to randomness of sleeping arrangements. Go to
the flower market. I have planned my trip well and manage get all the things I need.
That makes me happy. Considering I am running a wee bit late, I manage to catch
all the stands I need to catch – “Bit late today, darling?” Get all the prices and
inspiration I need for my Christmas quotes. Good.
I have some market stylee banter with one of the suppliers. The general vibe in the
market is sometimes like a Carry On film or Only Fools and Horses. Cackling old boys
with sexist jokes that try to get you to giggle and blush. I have hardened to it over the
years. Mr Supplier (old enough to be my Dad) eyes me up and down and asks if I am
married. “Yes” (waggles finger, raises eyebrows). “Well, tell you what darlin’ – he’s a
lucky man.” I respond “I’m a lucky lady”.
Back home, get ready to go out and meet my gorgeous lady friend Penelope. I feel
very lucky to have such a wonderful friend I can be myself with. I decide to walk over
to Crouch End. Starts to rain, reach a bus stop, bus comes (now that’s luck!). I have
no change, only a Jacks. The driver says “ok stand there, I’ll give you some change
when I get some”. I have to stand next to the driver for the entire journey. Feel a bit of
a twat standing there. Maybe my fellow passengers think I am his mate. Anyway, get
to the destination, he says “It’s ok, don’t worry about it”. After I pick my jaw off the
floor I hop off the bus, I feel very lucky. I just had a free ride!
Meet Pen. Buy our mate a birthday pressie – we are meeting her later. Our plan to
walk through Ally Pally is thwarted due to the weather. We drive straight to the pub…
2pm – arrive at pub and set up tab. Nice bottle of vino.
Chat chat chat…natter, natter… cackle cackle…more vino
We scoff pizza and quaff more wine. Suddenly the pub is full of men! We are the only
ladies in there! Lucky or what? Pen is in her element – single girl and all. My back is to
the hoards of men, although I am really not interested for obvious reasons (honest).
Judging by the expression on Pen’s face though – it’s a good view. The luck must be
rubbing off on Pen.
7pm – leave pub. Back to Pens. Giggles, bubbly, smokes, music and dancing to the
blues commence.
We finally make it to Kate’s birthday drinks at 10pm. Have a good old laff and the
flame haired beauty that is Kate is having a lovely weekend. My idea to move on to
another bar is dampened by the voice of reason that is Pen. “C’mon, Nads – we
should go home…” I submit – she’s quite right. Cab home – I feel lucky that my cab
driver is a nice man. Peanut is VERY pleased to see me – she rolls around the hall
purring loudly. I hug her and stroke her little body.
Bed. Alone. Sob.
Day three – Sunday
I feel your love running over me…like a wave (lyric stuck in my head today)
Hip still hurts.
D’you know what – it is so much easier to get out of bed in the morning when there is
no Steve keeping me there. That has its benefits and disadvantages. So, on the plus
side, I manage to drag my sorry, hung over ass out of bed at 8am in a huge effort to
get myself together to go and teach, yes teach. Disgusting behaviour really. On the
minus side, I have no Steve to snuggle, no chest rug to stick my nose into or bristly
head to sniff.
Now, how about this for a load of luck? I am a bit shaken by this. I get to the van this
morning and it is unlocked. I eye it with suspicion – anything nicked? I am so happy
that the van is still there and all the stock (at least £500 worth) is still on it. I feel like a
right dopey cow but, I am very lucky. In my neighbourhood, to still have a van and
stock after that is most fortunate.
I go to teach. It’s all good. Pen is not there though. The lightweight is still tucked up in
bed. Feel a wee bit self conscious as I have morning after guilt. Two classes – both
great – lovely energy which I feed off and it gets me going – shaking me out of my
post-party state.
Home. Continue with a big quote that has been one of my projects this week. Comes
together well. Finish it tomorrow.
For some reason I stick The Streets album on (second one – A Grand Don’t come for
Free). It is a raw and fierce album, like his first – I have been craving this album for
about a week now… never found the right opportunity to put it on. The urban poet
chats over beats and strings – and I realise – this album is all about luck and also
about Karma. He portrays a whole situation that spans over a period of time – it’s like
a film and you get to know all his characters. I feel lucky to have access to such
incredible music.
Bit of email chat with my friend Nick. Chat to my Mum and Dad. Steve’s Mum calls
me again to make sure I am ok. Bless. Play with the little Nut.
Steve will be home soon. I can’t wait to see him. I was getting worried… then he calls.
All is cool.
Steve returns home and his Dad pops over too. We spend a nice evening chatting
and hearing Steve’s tales of the weekend.
Day Four – Monday
Reindeer and sums
It’s a bit tough in the market this morning – I find it hard to get my head together. I get
some lovely flowers though. I get to one of my jobs, still dark outside. As I work the sun
comes up and the reception is filled with light. I feel lucky as I look at the view over
the river and rooftops. I have some nice spaces to work in.
On the way home, I am excited ‘cos Steve has a week off and he is at home. I’m
very lucky he is around – he can help me finish the quote! He has a much better
business head than me.
Ooh, good luck already! Post arrives and there is payment from one of our clients
whose debts date back to August. They’ve not paid everything but it’s a start!
Steve and I finish the quote and then another client gives me a call. We do bits and
pieces for them from time to time, usually for pitches and things. They now want us to
quote for a weekly flower contract! That is great news and more good luck!
I missed practice this morning so I go to the gym where I teach around 4pm to do my
own practice before my classes start. Practice felt good – my body felt quite light
and responsive. My mind felt clear. Good classes. I am very lucky to have such
wonderful, friendly and enthusiastic people to teach.
Steve and I chill for a bit and watch some really funny topical cartoon thing. We
giggle like a pair of kids.
We play with Peanut; Steve chases her around the flat. She loves that! He provides
the more rough and tumble aspect to her life. I give her the softer, more feminine
things she needs. I think she missed her Daddy over the weekend.
Day Five – Tuesday
Red lights and blue pine
Set the alarm for 4am and manage to get up for 4.30. Not bad going. I do a couple
of jobs but the cleaners are late at my last job so have to wait outside – unlucky. I get
a bit delayed and try my best to dash out of the Congestion Charge zone before
7am. Grrrrrrr… unlucky with the traffic lights. Keep getting stuck at red lights. I come
over the zone boundary at bang on 7am. Harrumph! Oh well, I’d better pay it – it’s
only a Jacks. It’s the principle though!
Come on coins! Work for me here, babies!
On a luckier note – I get home and Steve makes me coffee and brekkie. I really am a
lucky girl…
Hip is all good now – thank heavens!
Not going to practice today. I have too much work on, but also got my period which
is quite good timing really. I feel quite lucky that my body’s rhythms and my workload
have synchronised. Yep – no practice for the first three days of your period – “ladies
holiday”. I like ladies holiday – sometimes it comes at the best time ever – like when I
am feeling knackered. I then usually commence to spend the next two mornings
tucked up in bed guilt free. But, alas, due to work I have to actually get up!
Steve and I spend the day at the Workshop. It’s not far from where we live, round the
back of Steve’s Dads and Step mums house. We are lucky that they are home today
so we can go round at various intervals to nip to the loo and pinch biccies!
No overwhelming amount of good or bad luck today, although we are lucky that it is
dry. It’s no fun at the workshop when it rains. You can’t put stuff outside and it gets
too claustrophobic. I do feel very lucky that Steve is around this week. It is lovely to
work together, side by side in the workshop. I usually spend most of my time there
alone. It feels good. I feel warm inside, even though it is damn cold outside. We
spend the day getting organised for Thursday. This gives us an opportunity to chat
about things as we work – we address a few burning issues on the business side of
things. We learn from each other. It’s not all hard work though! We chat about how
we are going to bring up our kids. Steve tries to wind me up, to get a rise out of me.
He’s not succeeding today, though. Not bad on my part, all ladies issues and
hormones considered!
Back home, finish some paperwork and then soak in the bath. Eat, play with Peanut.
Curl up together in bed… zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Day six – Wednesday
Hallucinations and birdsong at sunset
Alarm set for 4am … rise by 4.45am. I am the world’s best snoozer. It used to do
Steve’s head in but I think he has turned deaf to it now. Poor bloke.
Market. Install job in the West End. Rush rush rush…
We spend the day back at the workshop. Steve makes lunch and a flask of coffee to
take with us. And then he lectures me on my caffeine intake (I am trying to cut
down)! I need all the help I can get today – less than 12 hours sleep in 3 nights. That is
not enough for me. I feel odd and have a few hallucinations. Nothing major – it
always happens when I’m shattered. I actually quite enjoy them, so long as they
happen at the right time and not when I’m driving, teaching or trying to be sensible.
Steve washes my van – I feel very lucky indeed ‘cos it’s filthy and I was dreading
doing it myself.
Our little Robin Redbreast friend spends a lot of his time with us today. He flies down
and perches himself on branches of Pussy Willow and Ilex berries. He starts scoffing
the berries. He is a bold little chap. Steve gives him some bread. I try to take photos of
him but he keeps flying off. I think he is teasing me.
I feel lucky that we have our workshop and such lovely things to work with. I love
flowers.
Good productive day! Pretty much everything done with minimum amount of
pressure. Steve leaves the workshop earlier to do things at home. I stay until sunset.
Steve’s Dad, Andreas, comes round with a pot of tea and biccies. How nice is that! I
am so lucky to have an amazing family.
Have to stop to buy some hair wax (very important Nadine survival item) on Holloway
Road. Parking space – at 430pm (!) – Now that’s lucky! I enjoy a moment walking
down the road. In amongst the traffic and sirens and people I tune into the most
beautiful evening birdsong. I feel as thought it is just me there. Maybe it’s the
hallucinations starting again! No, it’s just the beauty of nature. I feel lucky that I can
hear this and have time to stop and appreciate it.
We continue our work at home. I feel so sorry for Peanut sometimes. Here she is, all
chilled out and in we come with plants and moss and paper and … whatever! We
momentarily turn her world upside down whilst we take over the living room and
spare room. I spread out over the living room floor, cutting paper. Steve does the
online shop. First time for him, online shop, I mean and not shopping! We both marvel
at the slickness and sexiness of Ocado’s website. Boring? Sad? Us? Never!
Steve makes dinner. He has made brekkie, lunch and dinner today! And washed up!
Lucky me!
Got my cover teachers confirmed for tomorrow. I’m lucky I have managed to get
some cover – I was leaving it to the last minute before I decided what I wanted to do.
Better to get cover, though, I will be losing the powers of speech by tomorrow
evening.
We manage to chill for a bit and have a smoke.
Day seven – Thursday
Red sky in the morning…
Alarm for 5am. No hanging around today – even though I would love to. I have been
sleeping badly over the last few nights. Sleep is usually never a problem for me. So, a
combination of lack of sleep and broken sleep (anxiousness) has left me feeling
slightly jaded. Had some mad chaotic dreams too… you know, the kind that makes
you feel emotionally drained when you wake up?
We go down to this Christmas Fair thing in Knightsbridge in two vehicles. Steve and his
Dad in the van, I get to drive the car. We drive over Hampstead Heath – there is a
beautiful light over town today. Reddish/pinky sky and the skeletal look of the trees
on the Heath. It’s all very inspiring! On the radio, they play a New Order tune. You
know, the one that goes “I feel so extraordinary… something’s got a hold of me…” It
sets a nice pace to my drive, keeping Steve and Andreas in my sights in the rear view.
They both look so funny in my little van! I chuckle! Andreas drives the car home. We
are lucky he is around to do this or our parking bill would be £60.
The day itself is a strange one. We are on good form (surprisingly) which makes for
superb punter activity and schmoozing. Steve takes on the ladies and I handle the
men. Not literally, mind. I am a one man woman!
The whole event is very quiet. I don’t think they have marketed it very well. Anyway,
we don’t shift a great deal of gear. I’m not too worried about that as I can place
pretty much everything and we won’t be losing much money. On a marketing level it
is excellent! We do a good bit of networking and meet some interesting people. We
have also had very positive feedback on the standard and quality of our work.
The best bit of luck for the day … The client whose quote we were working on at the
beginning of the week have come back to us. They are going for pretty much
everything I have suggested which is superb!
Phone off all day – switch it on – messages – more work for the end of next week.
Good. It’s all good.
We get home – 8pm. Eat. Stroke the little Nut and play with her in a tired fashion. I feel
knackered. I start crashing on the sofa. Steve sends me to bed. He has his second
wind so stays up to smoke and watch a film. He tucks me in, then comes back to see
if I’m ok. I’m completely out of it by then. Sweet oblivion!
Moon day tomorrow, so no practice even though my ladies holiday is over! That is
lucky too, it means I can laze in bed happily and not wallow in guilt! I would be far to
tired to go to practice tomorrow.
The alarm is not set. My phone is off.
To sum this up…
I have been very lucky in life. I found out from my parents a number of years ago that
I shouldn’t really be here. No, not because of contraception problems – I did almost
die on 2 occasions in the first 2 years of my life. If I hadn’t died, I would have been
seriously handicapped. I don’t know what happened that made it all cool. My Mum
calls me “The Fighter”. In fact, my parents still, to this day, look at me and shake their
heads saying “If those doctors could see you now” (that usually occurs, traditionally
on my buffday). Bless the parents!
Since I learnt that I have tried to never take anything for granted. I appreciate all my
senses. I appreciate the fact that I can touch, smell, taste, see and hear all the
beautiful things in the world. I really appreciate the fact that I can do my physical
Yoga practice. This has made me a very positive and optimistic person.
I do believe, though, that the way your life pans out is down to how you interact with
others. I believe in Karma. I feel that if you send out appropriate positive energy to
others, be it humans or other animals, you get the same good vibes in return.
I am healthy and have work coming in. I have a wonderful family, amazing friends, a
nice comfy home, my Yoga practice, superb Yoga people to teach and hot wheels!
In case you haven’t noticed I have the most amazing husband! Steve and I met by
complete chance many many years ago. I was a very silly girl at the time and I am
lucky that Steve could see through that and hang on for me whilst I pissed around. I
am lucky he believed in me. I’m lucky he still does believe in me!
I think I was over analysing my levels of luck over the last seven days. It was interesting
to do. It was a bit of a funny time for this ‘cos we were so busy. I don’t usually work
such long hours – I’m usually managing to squeeze in more social interaction and
chilled times.
Good fun and interesting all the same. I have loved keeping a diary. And have
enjoyed reading some of the other entries. I haven’t kept a diary for years and years.
One of the main things I noticed is I have been a lot more aware of things in general
and a lot more appreciative of things. I have been paying more attention to the finer
details in life. I thank the coins for that.
Thank you, coins.
After my week I gave them to Steve as he was interested in contributing. As it turns out he didn’t end up doing the journal – the time wasn’t right for him. I decided to ask my best mate, but that took me ages to get round to doing. The pennies then lived safely tucked in Steve’s briefcase for AGES. I was going to mail them to Jen yesterday so I took them out yesterday morning.
Now…
Yesterday Steve had the most stressful day at work (I guess that can be fairly normal for him), however… on the way home he had a little smack in the car (nothing serious – he’s ok but it’s just a pain in the arse for him). It is his first accident in, like, at least 6 years. He also does so much driving – on the motorway every day to Slough and back. He then realised that he had misplaced 2 of his credit cards. Called the card companies – looks as though they have been stolen as there were retail purchases made on them. Bless him – he looked so deflated last night.
I chatted with Jen before Steve got home and we decided that I deliver the pennies by hand when we visit her and Rick in two weeks time in Cornwall. This morning I tucked the pennies back into Steve’s briefcase whilst he was in the shower – he needs their good energy!
www.nadinecannon.com
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)
;)